Arggghhh. I can't seem to sleep without thinking of the songs that aren't on my list.
It's gone past the 150 mark now. It's no longer a joke. I have MUSIC FEVER.
1. To The Moon & Back/I Knew I Loved You (Savage Garden)
2. My Love (Kele Le Roc)
3. Try Again (Aaliyah)
4. Falling (Pink)
5. Livin' La Vida Loca (Ricky Martin)
6. Hips Don't Lie (Shakira)
7. 30 Minutes (Tatu)
8. Dirty Water (Made In London)
9. Endless Love (Lionel Richie & Diana Ross)
10. A Whole New World (Disney's Aladdin Soundtrack - Peabo Bryson & Regina Hall)
11. When The Heartbreak Is Over (Tina Turner)
12. Murder On The Dancefloor (Sophie Ellis-Bextor)
13. I Will Survive (Gloria Gaynor)
14. That Don't Impress Me Much (Shania Twain)
15. Especially For you (Kylie Minogue & Jason Donovan)
16. Can't Get You Out Of My Head/Burning Up (Kylie)
17. Every Step you Take (Puff Daddy)
18. Out Of Touch (Uniting Nations)
19. Bailamos (Enrique Iglesias)
20. Not Me, Not I (Delta Goodrem)
21. If You Had All My Love (Jennifer Lopez)
22. Holler (Spice Girls)
23. Infatuation (Christina Aquilera)
24. I'm A Slave For You/Toxic (Britney Spears)
25. Don't Cha/Beep (The Pussycat Dolls)
26. Taste it (Blue)
27. Triple Tone Eyes (Just Jack)
28. I Wanna Be The Rain (RBD)
29. Flip Reverse (Blazing Squad)
30. Confessions Of A Broken Heart (Lindsay Lohan)
31. In & Out Of My Life (Onephatdeeva)
32. Can't Decide (Scissor Sisters)
33. Yellow/Trouble (Coldplay)
34. Skater Boy (Avril Lavigne)
35. Milkshake (Kelis)
36. Can You Feel The Love Tonight (Disney's Lion King Soundtrack - Joseph Williams & Sally Dworksy)
37. Cry Me A River/Oh No What You Got (Justin Timberlake)
38. You get What You Give (New Radicals)
39. Don't Turn Off The Lights/No Hay Igual (Nelly Furtado)
40. Guilty/Miss California (Dante Thomas)
41. Gone (N*Sync)
42. Girlfriend (N*Sync featuring Nelly)
43. Please Do Me Right (Andreas Johnson)
44. Heartbreak Hotel/I Learnt From The Best (Whitney Houston)
45. Leave Right Now/Light My Fire (Will Young)
46. Faith (George Micheal)
47. Insatiable (Darren Hayes)
48. Rock Wiv You/Foolish (Ashanti)
49. Lady In Red (Chris De Burgh)
50. Never Be The Same Again (Mel C & Lisa 'Left Eye' Lopes)
51. Sunrise/Stars (Simply Red)
52. How Can You Mend A Broken Heart (Al Green)
53. I'm Outta Love (Anastacia)
54. Here With You/White Flag (Dido)
55. What I Went To School For (Busted)
56. You Make Me Wanna/You Got It Bad (Usher)
57. Call You Sexy (VS)
58. Sexy (Honey Soundtrack - Shawn Desman)
59. Perfect 10 (Beautiful South)
60. Tourniquet (Evanescence)
61. Put Your Arms Around Me (Natural)
62. The Way I Feel/Switch It Off (Oakenfold)
63. Angel Of Mine/The Boy Is Mine (Brandy & Monica)
64. Mi Chico Latino (Geri Halliwel)
65. Crush (Jeniffer Paign)
66. James Dean I Wanna Know/If Your Not The One (Daniel Bedingfield)
67. In And Out (3rd Edge)
68. Wherever You Will Go (The Calling)
69. Angels (Robbie Williams)
70. Won't Take It Lying Down (Honeyz)
71. My Girl (Westlife)
72. Irresistable (Jessica Simpson)
73. What's Left Of Me (Nick Lachey)
74. Dilemma (Kelly Rowland & Nelly)
75. Baby Boy (Beyonce Knowles & Sean Paul)
76. Unbreak My Heart/He Wasn't Man Enough For Me (Toni Braxton)
77. I'm Your Angel (Celine Dion & R Kelly)
78. Sway (Shaft)
79. Summergirls (Lyte Funkie Ones)
80. Give It To You (Jordan Knight)
81. A Thousand Miles (Vanessa Carlton)
82. Stand By Me (Ben E King)
83. By Your Side (Sade)
84. Heartbreaker (Mariah Carey)
85. Walk On By (Dionne Warwick)
86. Gotta Tell You (Samantha Mamba)
87. Windmills Of Your Mind (Dusty Springfield)
88. Sugar Baby Love (The Rubettes)
89. Shake It (JC Chasez)
90. Moon River (Frank Sinatra)
91. Devil In Disguise (Elvis Presley)
92. Searching My Soul (Ally McBeal's Themetune - Vonda Shepard)
93. It's In His Kiss - The Shoop Shoop Song (Mermaid's Soundtrack - Cher & Co.)
94. Shackles - Praise You (Mary Mary)
95. S Club Party/Reach (S Club 7)
96. The Bad Touch (Bloodhound Gang)
97. All The Small Things (Blink 182)
98. The Way I Am (Eminem)
99. Karma Hotel (Spooks)
100. Case Of The Ex (Mya)
101. Sunshine/Out Of Reach (Gabrielle)
102. Two Can Play That Game (Bobby Brown)
103. Red Alert (Basement Jaxx)
104. Unleash The Dragon/The Thong Song (Sisqo)
105. It Wasn't Me (Shaggy & Ricardo 'Rikrok' Ducent)
106. Written In The Stars (LeAnn Rimes & Elton John)
107. Somewhere Over The Rainbow (Eva Cassidy)
108. Straight Up (Chante Moore)
109. Buck Rogers (Feeder)
110. Mambo No 5 (Lou Bega)
111. 2 Times (Ann Lee)
112. Sing It Back (Moloko)
113. Sweet Like Chocolate (Shanks & Bigfoot)
114. Rewind (Artful Dodger & Craig David)
115. Walking Away/7 Days (Craig David)
116. Miami (Will Smith)
117. Each Time (East 17)
118. Guess I Was A Fool (Another Level)
119. So Long (Fierce)
120. Deeper Shade Of Blue/Tragedy (STEPS)
121. Taboo (Glamma Kid & Shola Ama)
122. King Of My Castle (Wamdue Project)
123. 9PM Till I Come (ATB)
124. You Don't Know Me (Armand Van Helden)
125. Dip It Low (Christina Milian)
126. Stutter (Joe)
127. Breathe & Stop (Q-Tip)
128. Unpretty (TLC)
129. Another Day In Paradise (Brandy & Ray J)
130. California Love (2Pac)
131. Funky Love (Kavana)
132. Get It On Tonight (Montell Jordan)
133. One Thing (Amerie)
134. You Gotta Be (Des'ree)
135. Gravel Pit (Wu-Tang Clan)
136. Bufferfly (Crazy Town)
137. Oochie Wally (QB Finest)
138. Get Ur Freak On (Tomb Raider Soundtrack - Missy Elliot & Nelly Furtado) * NOT THE ORIGINAL *
139. I Breathe Again (Adam Rickitt)
140. Kiss Me (Sixpence None The Richer)
141. I Don't Wanna Close My Eyes (Aerosmith)
142. Back Here (BBMAK)
143. Wifey (Next)
144. Thank You For Loving Me (Jon Bon Jovi)
145. Dancing In The Moonlight (Toploader)
146. You Stole The Sun From My Heart (Manic Street Preachers)
147. Just Looking (Stereophonics)
148. Closing Time (Semisonic)
149. I Can Only Disappoint You (Mansun)
150. Taste In Men (Placebo)
151. Always: Your Way (My Vitriol)
152. With Arms Wide Open (Creed)
153. A Song For Lovers (Richard Ashcroft)
154. Breathe (Blu Cantrell & Sean Paul)
155. Pack Your Shit/Step Inside (Melanie B)
OKAY OKAY I KNOW IT WAS MEANT TO BE MY TOP 50 BUT I JUST COULDN'T FIT THEM ALL IN
* I believe translates to IT WAS THE MUSIC
** Reworded in proper Spanish by Alex
I was reading a post on a foreign blog – I’d reference it but to be honest there was absolutely nothing of interest in her blog but she had made a post of her music add-list – unsurprisingly all her sings were hillsongs – now call me ignorant but what the fuck is a HILLSONG? Me being someone who often has his foot in his mouth asked ‘what pray tell is a hillsong’ – a fellow blog watcher caught my ignorance and guided me rather expertly to the hillsong website. Which I found was odes to Jesus. Now since I’m not Catholic or Christian I must admit they didn’t really seem like something I’d listen to with zeal but I must say these people have amazing voices and were born to sing.
The post did however awaken that stark inside that had me musing as to what my music add-list would consist of... and what started out as one song very quickly became many.... many became more, and more fast flooded into loads. Which is why I've gone crazy making a list of songs.
Saturday, March 10, 2007
Friday, March 09, 2007
Dare To Be Daring?
Have I every mentioned I've done Fire Walks for charity?
Well if I haven't I did a Fire Walk in 2005 and another in 2006. Both times I had to walk on 20 ft of embers burning at 1200 degress fahrenheit - it was no mean feat - I was scared shitless... but it was for a good cause and I managed to raise £650 the first time. The second time was not as bad as the first - my family missed the first one and as it was for charity I did a second one and barely managed to raise sufficient money for it the second time £300.
Both times it was done for Phoenix House - a national charity that aims to help people end their dependency on drugs and alcohol. I lost count of the people I asked for sponsorship who asked me if I had drug/alcohol problems. I didn't thankfully. But I had drunk excessively in my teens and can sympathise with people who weren't as lucky as me when it came to cutting down. I don't drink at all now. I'm the type of person who can't stop after one.
Well anyway getting to the point... I recieved a letter from Phoenix Futures (as it's now called) - asking if I'd be interested in taking part in one of their future fundraising events/challenges. And guess what?
They're looking for volunteers to
a. Trek up Mount Kilimanjaro (9 days)
b. Trek up Mount Everest (18 days)
c. Trek up Mount Kinabalu, cycle across Borneo, & White Water Raft (10 days)
d. Trekking across The Great wall Of China & helping rebuilt part of it by carrying bricks up the 1000s steps (9 days)
e. Trek to the Lost City of the Incas Machu Picchu (10 days)
f. Fire Walk
g. Glass Walk (Advanced Fire Walking)
h. Parachute Jump
i. Cycles all around UK
j. Marathons all around the UK
Now I had a freak accident on a bike when I was very little and can not bare the thought of cycling anymore. So anything involving a bike is out for me. I don't run very well either so there goes that too.
That leaves me wanting to either do
1. Trek up Kilimanjaro
2. Trek up Mount Everest
3. Great Wall Of China - I wanna see it more than trek across or help rebuilt it (did you know this is the only man-made object visible from space?)
4. Incan Trail
5. Parachute Jump
6. Glass Walk
Now I really want to do a parachute jump but it really doesn't compare to how much I want to do hike up Kilimanjaro or Mount Everest. Everest being the choice of preference (it's the highest mountain in the world)
But problem is: Everest one is in October 2007 - which is bang in the middle of my pre-exam revision phase. And Kilikmanjaro is in January 2008, after my exams.
Hard choice huh?
So there you have it... If it all goes well I may be hiking up Mount Kilimanjaro in less than a year's time.
Yay me! But I gotta get £3000 in sponsorship... and that is not going to be easy. I'm gonna see if I can have a word with the Local Director of Lloyds TSB (my employer) and see if they may be willing to sponsor me a grand. Time to kiss ass.
Well if I haven't I did a Fire Walk in 2005 and another in 2006. Both times I had to walk on 20 ft of embers burning at 1200 degress fahrenheit - it was no mean feat - I was scared shitless... but it was for a good cause and I managed to raise £650 the first time. The second time was not as bad as the first - my family missed the first one and as it was for charity I did a second one and barely managed to raise sufficient money for it the second time £300.
Both times it was done for Phoenix House - a national charity that aims to help people end their dependency on drugs and alcohol. I lost count of the people I asked for sponsorship who asked me if I had drug/alcohol problems. I didn't thankfully. But I had drunk excessively in my teens and can sympathise with people who weren't as lucky as me when it came to cutting down. I don't drink at all now. I'm the type of person who can't stop after one.
Well anyway getting to the point... I recieved a letter from Phoenix Futures (as it's now called) - asking if I'd be interested in taking part in one of their future fundraising events/challenges. And guess what?
They're looking for volunteers to
a. Trek up Mount Kilimanjaro (9 days)
b. Trek up Mount Everest (18 days)
c. Trek up Mount Kinabalu, cycle across Borneo, & White Water Raft (10 days)
d. Trekking across The Great wall Of China & helping rebuilt part of it by carrying bricks up the 1000s steps (9 days)
e. Trek to the Lost City of the Incas Machu Picchu (10 days)
f. Fire Walk
g. Glass Walk (Advanced Fire Walking)
h. Parachute Jump
i. Cycles all around UK
j. Marathons all around the UK
Now I had a freak accident on a bike when I was very little and can not bare the thought of cycling anymore. So anything involving a bike is out for me. I don't run very well either so there goes that too.
That leaves me wanting to either do
1. Trek up Kilimanjaro
2. Trek up Mount Everest
3. Great Wall Of China - I wanna see it more than trek across or help rebuilt it (did you know this is the only man-made object visible from space?)
4. Incan Trail
5. Parachute Jump
6. Glass Walk
Now I really want to do a parachute jump but it really doesn't compare to how much I want to do hike up Kilimanjaro or Mount Everest. Everest being the choice of preference (it's the highest mountain in the world)
But problem is: Everest one is in October 2007 - which is bang in the middle of my pre-exam revision phase. And Kilikmanjaro is in January 2008, after my exams.
Hard choice huh?
So there you have it... If it all goes well I may be hiking up Mount Kilimanjaro in less than a year's time.
Yay me! But I gotta get £3000 in sponsorship... and that is not going to be easy. I'm gonna see if I can have a word with the Local Director of Lloyds TSB (my employer) and see if they may be willing to sponsor me a grand. Time to kiss ass.
Thursday, March 08, 2007
Me & My Dodgy Hair
As promised. A photo of the very dodgy haircut - sorry for being such a miserable git. I'd smile but it might actually make me happy ;o)
Heres To Time Wasting
I saw this on someone’s blog and I decided very ungracefully to steal it…
Here we go:
YOUR REAL NAME: Amit
YOUR GANGSTA NAME (1st 4 letters plus izzle): Amitizzle
YOUR DETECTIVE NAME (fave color + fave animal): Red Lion
YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME (middle name + childhood street): Sky James
YOUR STAR WARS NAME (last 3 letters of your last name + first 2 letters of your first name + first 3 letters of Mom's maiden name): Hahamgan
YOUR SUPER HERO NAME (2nd fave color + fave drink): Yellow Tequilla
YOUR IRAQI NAME (2nd letter of your first name + 3rd letter of your last name + any letter of your middle name + 2nd letter of your Mom's maiden name + 3rd letter of your Dad's middle name + 1st letter of a sibling's first name + last letter of your Mom's middle name): Masaadi (weirdly sounds Iraqi)
YOUR WITNESS PROTECTION PROGRAM NAME (Grandma/Grandpa's first name + Jones): Manek Jones
YOUR GOTH NAME (Black + name of one of your pets): Black Whsiper
YOUR AMERICAN IDOL NAME (fav car and sea food): Merc Cod
NAME OF YOUR DREAM BAND (name of computer + printer): Rogue Packard
MOVIE STAR NAME (sibling's middle name + mother-in-law's maiden name): Pramod Pramod
YOUR ALTER EGO NAME (name of one your childhood pets + popular brand of clothes when you were young): Whisper Inside
YOUR LAWYER NAME (fav actor's last name + fav hard liquor): Hernandez JD
YOUR HIP HOP NAME (fav candy + fruit): Cola Bottles Passion
I can’t believe I wasted time doing that. Oh well at least you know a few things about me now.
PS – I have no middle name so I made one up. Sky. I want to actually change my name to that I can incorporate ‘Sky’ in. Bit if I have that as my middle name my initials become ASS – so I haven’t as of yet.
PSS - And I have no mother-in-law last time I checked so I used my mother instead
Here we go:
YOUR REAL NAME: Amit
YOUR GANGSTA NAME (1st 4 letters plus izzle): Amitizzle
YOUR DETECTIVE NAME (fave color + fave animal): Red Lion
YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME (middle name + childhood street): Sky James
YOUR STAR WARS NAME (last 3 letters of your last name + first 2 letters of your first name + first 3 letters of Mom's maiden name): Hahamgan
YOUR SUPER HERO NAME (2nd fave color + fave drink): Yellow Tequilla
YOUR IRAQI NAME (2nd letter of your first name + 3rd letter of your last name + any letter of your middle name + 2nd letter of your Mom's maiden name + 3rd letter of your Dad's middle name + 1st letter of a sibling's first name + last letter of your Mom's middle name): Masaadi (weirdly sounds Iraqi)
YOUR WITNESS PROTECTION PROGRAM NAME (Grandma/Grandpa's first name + Jones): Manek Jones
YOUR GOTH NAME (Black + name of one of your pets): Black Whsiper
YOUR AMERICAN IDOL NAME (fav car and sea food): Merc Cod
NAME OF YOUR DREAM BAND (name of computer + printer): Rogue Packard
MOVIE STAR NAME (sibling's middle name + mother-in-law's maiden name): Pramod Pramod
YOUR ALTER EGO NAME (name of one your childhood pets + popular brand of clothes when you were young): Whisper Inside
YOUR LAWYER NAME (fav actor's last name + fav hard liquor): Hernandez JD
YOUR HIP HOP NAME (fav candy + fruit): Cola Bottles Passion
I can’t believe I wasted time doing that. Oh well at least you know a few things about me now.
PS – I have no middle name so I made one up. Sky. I want to actually change my name to that I can incorporate ‘Sky’ in. Bit if I have that as my middle name my initials become ASS – so I haven’t as of yet.
PSS - And I have no mother-in-law last time I checked so I used my mother instead
Wednesday, March 07, 2007
Wise Words From A Wise Man
I'm feeling awfully lazee today and can't be bothered to write up a proper post so I'm just gonna cut and paste something nice I read from some poor bloke's blog (I've forgotten who now)
Apparently this is what the Dalai Lama had to say some time ago...
* Take into account that great love and great achievements involve great risk.
* When you lose, don’t lose the lesson.
* Follow the three R’s: Respect for self; Respect for others; Responsibility for all your actions
* Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck. (I really hope this is true, but I guess time will tell)
* Learn the rules so you know how to break them properly. (Wise man)
* Don’t let a little dispute injure a great relationship. (Easier said than done)
* When you realize you’ve made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it. (LOL)
* Spend some time alone everyday.
* Open arms to changes, but don’t let go of your values.
* Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.
* Live a good, honorable life. Then when you get older and think back, you’ll be able to enjoy it a second time.
* A loving atmosphere in your home is the foundation for your life. (Again easier said than done)
* In disagreement with loved ones, deal only with the current situation. Don’t bring up the past.
* Share your knowledge. It’s a way to achieve immortality.
* Be gentle with the earth.
* Once a year, go someplace you’ve never been before.
* Remember that the best relationship is the one which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other.
* Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.
* Approach love and cooking with reckless abandon. (T - does this approach to cooking work or am I at risk of burning the kitchen down?)
Seriously after that no wonder Buddists are so wise and live such pleasant endearing lives. I think I wanna convert!
Apparently this is what the Dalai Lama had to say some time ago...
* Take into account that great love and great achievements involve great risk.
* When you lose, don’t lose the lesson.
* Follow the three R’s: Respect for self; Respect for others; Responsibility for all your actions
* Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck. (I really hope this is true, but I guess time will tell)
* Learn the rules so you know how to break them properly. (Wise man)
* Don’t let a little dispute injure a great relationship. (Easier said than done)
* When you realize you’ve made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it. (LOL)
* Spend some time alone everyday.
* Open arms to changes, but don’t let go of your values.
* Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.
* Live a good, honorable life. Then when you get older and think back, you’ll be able to enjoy it a second time.
* A loving atmosphere in your home is the foundation for your life. (Again easier said than done)
* In disagreement with loved ones, deal only with the current situation. Don’t bring up the past.
* Share your knowledge. It’s a way to achieve immortality.
* Be gentle with the earth.
* Once a year, go someplace you’ve never been before.
* Remember that the best relationship is the one which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other.
* Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.
* Approach love and cooking with reckless abandon. (T - does this approach to cooking work or am I at risk of burning the kitchen down?)
Seriously after that no wonder Buddists are so wise and live such pleasant endearing lives. I think I wanna convert!
Tuesday, March 06, 2007
Irrational Fears & Mates Who Try To Help
I think I understand why one has irrational fears.... I believe it stems from having irrational mates.
Take yesterday for example - after I'd written my post I was speaking to Nick about it and how is that not the weirdest most irrational fear to have - getting ones hair cut. He laughed - he couldn't believe he didn't know this about me.
He very mockingly sympathised. I ignored the mockingly. And he invited me over later. The guys were there surprise surprise. They all looked at me very suspiciously (the other day I did a superhero test and apparently I'm Spiderman) and I felt a gay-spider-tingle and knew something was up. Nick walked over and past me. Rabbit walked to my left and Dee to my right. The others watched. Nick grabbed me from behind and the others joined in. Before one could scream GANG-BANG or RAPE - they'd pinned me on the sofa in the living room with my head hanging off the side - this was all at a rather uncomfortable angle. Confused but weary I resisted.
I had no idea what was up until Rabbit returned from Nick's bedroom wielding a hair-trimming thingy. To say I made as much noise as humanly possible would be no understatement but poor small tiny smurf sized me was being pinned by four almost strapping guys and there was no way I'd be able to break free. I swear the neighbour called the police who turned up an hour later (If something was really up I'd have been dead and the body would have been disposed off half an hour ago)
Within 30 minutes (actually a lot of pain later - the device they used was crude and not adequently oiled) my head was mostly shaved. They let me go after this as the final touches needed to be done with me co-operating. And I cooperated at this point as the damage had been done - my hair was all gone.
So there you have it. I went from 6 or 7 inch long hair to less than 1/2 inch hair. And I swear my hair looks comical - it's completely uneven and there is no real style to it - except that its short.
But as Nick so clearly put it "at least you didn't have to go to a hairdresser".
With friends like that - who needs enemies.
Funnily enough it still feels surreal and I woke up this morning and burst into laughter. How does one correct something like this. I'm gonna need a grade one all over - but strangely the randomness to it - is kinda growing on me (no pun intended)
I may have to post a picture at some point (I may have a before!)
Take yesterday for example - after I'd written my post I was speaking to Nick about it and how is that not the weirdest most irrational fear to have - getting ones hair cut. He laughed - he couldn't believe he didn't know this about me.
He very mockingly sympathised. I ignored the mockingly. And he invited me over later. The guys were there surprise surprise. They all looked at me very suspiciously (the other day I did a superhero test and apparently I'm Spiderman) and I felt a gay-spider-tingle and knew something was up. Nick walked over and past me. Rabbit walked to my left and Dee to my right. The others watched. Nick grabbed me from behind and the others joined in. Before one could scream GANG-BANG or RAPE - they'd pinned me on the sofa in the living room with my head hanging off the side - this was all at a rather uncomfortable angle. Confused but weary I resisted.
I had no idea what was up until Rabbit returned from Nick's bedroom wielding a hair-trimming thingy. To say I made as much noise as humanly possible would be no understatement but poor small tiny smurf sized me was being pinned by four almost strapping guys and there was no way I'd be able to break free. I swear the neighbour called the police who turned up an hour later (If something was really up I'd have been dead and the body would have been disposed off half an hour ago)
Within 30 minutes (actually a lot of pain later - the device they used was crude and not adequently oiled) my head was mostly shaved. They let me go after this as the final touches needed to be done with me co-operating. And I cooperated at this point as the damage had been done - my hair was all gone.
So there you have it. I went from 6 or 7 inch long hair to less than 1/2 inch hair. And I swear my hair looks comical - it's completely uneven and there is no real style to it - except that its short.
But as Nick so clearly put it "at least you didn't have to go to a hairdresser".
With friends like that - who needs enemies.
Funnily enough it still feels surreal and I woke up this morning and burst into laughter. How does one correct something like this. I'm gonna need a grade one all over - but strangely the randomness to it - is kinda growing on me (no pun intended)
I may have to post a picture at some point (I may have a before!)
Monday, March 05, 2007
Haircut
I was reading a post by I think I'm Gay and he just had a haircut - which was ironic actually because I've been meaning to go for several weeks now and haven't gotten around to it.
I'm really happy today - I just spoke to Jyoti (one of my best friends) this morning and she's getting engaged on the 25th March. I'm the first of our circle of friends she's told (what a way to make someone feel special) and I'm really pleased for her. Just gave me a sharp reminder that my hair needs a trim and neatening-up session with someone who can work magic with his fingers and a pair of scissors.
Now most people have fairly normal fears... spiders, heights, water, enclosed spaces, etc... what do I have a fear of? Haircuts... I don't know what it is but I hate getting haircuts. I've yet to have a haircut where I've thought - this looks good or haven't really felt anxious. I always find excuses to avoid getting my hair cut - but I'm one of those people who needs a haircut like a week after I've just had one. My hair is thus always shaggy and it's a look I've grown rather fond of (I wonder why). The thing I hate most is when they ask 'You like it?' at the end with a mirror and you wanna cry... I find I just politely say 'yes'.
But I can't exactly go to my best mate's engagement party looking like a dodgy uncle with overgrown bleached hair (yes I bleach my hair to give it a brownish tint). And I also have realised that I've been invited to Suenita's (another friend) Wedding on the 11th March. And I have a Mother's Day party I've been invited to on the 18th March. I need to look somewhat neat for all of those. So despite not wanting to I must get my hair cut this week.
Oh well I might as well start goading myself into getting one.
PS - Pictures paint a thousand words - it really depicts how I feel
Sunday, March 04, 2007
Unhealthy Obessions
I would appear that this flipping website has triggered some sort of obsessive urge (that's almost drug like)
I think this one is my favourite one
[SSD laughs evilly & unearthly]
| Your Aura is Red |
 You have a high level of emotion. This can mean passion, but it can also mean rage. Usually, you don't take these emotions out on others. You just use them as motivation - and it works! The purpose of your life: embracing all the wonders of the life, lots of travels, and tons of adventures Famous reds include: Madonna, Marilyn Monroe, Jennifer Lopez Careers for you to try: Dancer, Boxer, Surgeon |
I think this one is my favourite one
[SSD laughs evilly & unearthly]
| You Are 82% Evil |
 You're the most evil person you know. The devil is even a little scared of you! |
Saturday, March 03, 2007
Women
I must ask this as it has been bothering me for days.
Jules I feel you may be the most suitable to answer this (most obviously as your sex organs are internal) but what exactly does a woman (girl) mean when she says (and I quote - as I have it saved on my phone) - it arrived as a text...
"I don't know why but I think you'll make a good father. Haha a bit random thought. Anyways, speak to you later. Good night"
Guys please don't feel left out - I'd like to know everyone's thoughts. All input will be appreciated.
To give a bit more of a background - this is the girl I've been out with a couple of times.
Is this her just stating a fact?
Is this her giving me her opinion?
Is this her saying she wants me to father her babies?
Or am I reading too much into it?
Jules I feel you may be the most suitable to answer this (most obviously as your sex organs are internal) but what exactly does a woman (girl) mean when she says (and I quote - as I have it saved on my phone) - it arrived as a text...
"I don't know why but I think you'll make a good father. Haha a bit random thought. Anyways, speak to you later. Good night"
Guys please don't feel left out - I'd like to know everyone's thoughts. All input will be appreciated.
To give a bit more of a background - this is the girl I've been out with a couple of times.
Is this her just stating a fact?
Is this her giving me her opinion?
Is this her saying she wants me to father her babies?
Or am I reading too much into it?
Thursday, March 01, 2007
The number 65
I'm beset with myself today.
My dad celebrates his 65th birthday today. And the scary thing is I'm only 24. That's a whopping 40 year difference.
I knew this was coming... I've know it for days now... but this is huge and I can't seem to get past it.
Normally things like this would not have affected me as the way I've lived my life in the past has always steered me clear of him. If I was visiting my mum - I'd always pick a time to go around when I knew he wouldn't be there.
After years of neglect, absence and not-caring on his part during the years I lived at home (not just me - the whole family) - I find I have little time for him and his charades. I don't really have a relationship with him, I never have and I very likely never will - I know this - so I don't pretend things are okay. For my mum's sake I may say hello to him if he crosses my path.
And then last year May - so many things changed. For my mum's & niece's sake I helped them out financially to move closer to my Aunt and I (they live a 2 minute walk away now) and I find unconsciously that the family that became my ex-family has become my family again and I'm still trying to grasp that fact and accept that reality.
I knew there would be consequences when I made that decision last year to move them so close but if it means my mum lives a happier life for the remaining years in her life (God knows how miserable her life had been and probably still is somewhat) then it's a small price to pay.
Main problem is that with my mum now so close she expects me to come over for dinner and refuses to allow me to cook for myself when she is so nearby. She sees it like and it upsets her profoundly when I don't. I've given in now and find myself there at 7pm and left by 8pm. She'd rather I do this than eat at home (come, eat and go) but it means now that all of a sudden my isolated individual lifestyle has changed and I find myself in a family dynamic again. And now at 65 my dad seems forever at home and conflicts I'd resigned to fighting seem ever ready to explode. For my mum's sake I steer clear. But it infuriates me when he claims that he wasn't absent when I was growing up and cared very much. All I have to show that he cared was a N64 (Nintendo gaming system) that he helped finance in my very early teens - which ironically my brother borrowed and pawned off to a neighbour for £20 without my consent. The height of irony.
So I have an invite to my dad's 65th birthday celebration that I can't not go to and I find I've somehow been given the task of arranging a cake. How do I let myself into these situations?
My dad celebrates his 65th birthday today. And the scary thing is I'm only 24. That's a whopping 40 year difference.
I knew this was coming... I've know it for days now... but this is huge and I can't seem to get past it.
Normally things like this would not have affected me as the way I've lived my life in the past has always steered me clear of him. If I was visiting my mum - I'd always pick a time to go around when I knew he wouldn't be there.
After years of neglect, absence and not-caring on his part during the years I lived at home (not just me - the whole family) - I find I have little time for him and his charades. I don't really have a relationship with him, I never have and I very likely never will - I know this - so I don't pretend things are okay. For my mum's sake I may say hello to him if he crosses my path.
And then last year May - so many things changed. For my mum's & niece's sake I helped them out financially to move closer to my Aunt and I (they live a 2 minute walk away now) and I find unconsciously that the family that became my ex-family has become my family again and I'm still trying to grasp that fact and accept that reality.
I knew there would be consequences when I made that decision last year to move them so close but if it means my mum lives a happier life for the remaining years in her life (God knows how miserable her life had been and probably still is somewhat) then it's a small price to pay.
Main problem is that with my mum now so close she expects me to come over for dinner and refuses to allow me to cook for myself when she is so nearby. She sees it like and it upsets her profoundly when I don't. I've given in now and find myself there at 7pm and left by 8pm. She'd rather I do this than eat at home (come, eat and go) but it means now that all of a sudden my isolated individual lifestyle has changed and I find myself in a family dynamic again. And now at 65 my dad seems forever at home and conflicts I'd resigned to fighting seem ever ready to explode. For my mum's sake I steer clear. But it infuriates me when he claims that he wasn't absent when I was growing up and cared very much. All I have to show that he cared was a N64 (Nintendo gaming system) that he helped finance in my very early teens - which ironically my brother borrowed and pawned off to a neighbour for £20 without my consent. The height of irony.
So I have an invite to my dad's 65th birthday celebration that I can't not go to and I find I've somehow been given the task of arranging a cake. How do I let myself into these situations?